I want to believe - help my unbelief
I want to believe. I yearn to have the happiness and faith that Christians have. I'm scared though. I'm afraid of a few things. I have questions. Many, and I would love to have answers. I'll start by saying I've begun reading "Is God real?" By Lee Strobel.
1. Self Discipline: Will I have the will power to study the Bible and learn enough to genuinely say I believe in Christ?
2. False Belief: Will I just tell myself that I believe and ignore my actual doubts while I attend church and men's groups?
3. Potential Nonexistence: Say I do commit my life to Christ... If there is no eternal life or creator... How much of my life would've been spent worshiping something/someone that doesn't exist?
4. Remorseless Sinning: I am not too proud to admit that I commit the many sins most young men my age commit. However, I'm afraid that I will continue to commit these sins without a genuine feeling of remorse or a want to stop.
5. Earthly Desires: I'm afraid I will decide to use my available time to study the word of God chasing the desires that currently bring me happiness. Hunting, Fishing, Video Games, Archery, Racing etc.
A: It is good you are searching for truth and seeking answers. It means God is drawing you to Himself.
All these issues will be resolved once God transforms you at salvation. He instantly makes you into a new creation. Your old sinful self dies and you receive the righteous nature. This means your desires are in line with God's and you now live out your purpose as a human as he originally designed us. To reflect God's image; righteous. You will hate sin and desire to live rightly. You will conquer any sin in your life and have victory over it (thus growing in sanctification/becoming more like Christ).
Believing is not really a question of willpower. If you believe something, you can't help but believe it. If you love God, you will want to worship him and get to know him better - by reading about him.
Everyone intuitively already knows God exists. Those in the sin nature flee from Him because the love their sins and dont want to be accountable to God. They live in an idolatrous fantasy land pretending he isnt real. But they know He is real.
Even if religion [God/Christianity] were false, there wouldn't be a better way to spend your time, since apart from that, everything you do would be meaningless anyway. But we know it is true because of the evidences.
Here are some helps on that:
A. 4 ways God reveals Himself
B. See 1st video
(Other 2 vids are helpful too)
Understand man's condition because of the Fall in Eden [sin entered], and how the entire Bible points to Jesus who was promised to "restore" us to right standing with God, to righteousness, and live out our purpose.
A. Eden sin & redemption
B. Understand the Gospel << vid clip
Your new nature will love God, and desire to know Him more and more and to become more close in personal relationship... thus you will desire to read and know the Bible deeper as it contains what He wants us to know about Him. Of the Trinity, and of Jesus.
Here are a few helps towards that
A. Who God is:
Understanding who He really is
Trinity faq
3. Christians in free countries are statistically happier and live a more fulfilled in life. But regardless of where you live, don't fall for the Happiness myth. There is a false gospel out there and false idea that all is well on earth with believers. Its far from the truth. To help you understand this clearer
1. What to understand: read this free book (pdf)
2. Grasp the truth about Suffering and living in a sin stained world.
Understanding Happiness is a temporary feeling - not a position. The believers Joy & Peace is about our right standing with God... because Jesus the Prince of Peace redeemed us from the power of death and from damnation; he saved us from God's wrath. Thus our position before God is secure because Jesus paid our fine. We rejoice in that & are always grateful. But, our best life isnt now its in eternity. Yet our salvation position now and forever is eternal. See both messages linked here on that.
4. Not following Christ also means sinning without remorse. Either you repent of your sins & follow him, or you are sinning remorselessly constantly.
5. The types of desires you list are just passions or hobbies. Not necessarily sinful activities unless you pre plan to do (or think or do) sinful things with it, from it, or while doing it. The person in their sin nature (as noted above) can only do things sinfully. But the one in the righteous nature strives to do things with righteous intentions.
So, you seem to have a wrong idea here as if you need to become a monk in order to be a Christian. You don't. We are in the world but not of it. [The World in context means living on earth as those who sin]...
Once you are Christian, you will live with passion for Christ. Do you ever worry that all your hunting will interfere with your fishing? Of course not. You love fishing, so you will always be motivated to make time for fishing. Jesus called the Fishermen apostles to follow Him and he would make them fishers of men. They would love God & others and thus desire to reach them with the Gospel. You can do that in all the areas of your hobbies or things you feel God leading you to use to glorify Him and share truth with others in love. Instead of the hobby being only about your selfish pursuit - you now use it to bless others and glorify God.
And it will be the same with all areas in your life. You will seek to find opportunities to glorify God and bless humans. As you were designed to do 😊.
Luke 1:74 that we, being delivered from the hand of our enemies, might serve him without fear, in holiness and righteousness before him wall our days.
At the moment of salvation you yield your whole being to Him, and he will empower you to live for Him. As a believer, Jesus reigns on the Throne of your life as your God & Creator, King and Savior. God gives us the power to live holy lives once we are born again. The Holy Spirit lives in the believer enabling and helping us out. Jesus called him the Helper.
Today - Deal with your salvation issue first, then all else you have concern about will fall into place. 🙂
After obeying the Gospel, you are a babe in Christ. Therefore you start small and take baby steps, and mature & grow from there. This can help you get started.
God bless
* Bookmark this page, so you can go through the above contents today & in the coming weeks and month, in a dedicated quiet time at home. You can even set daily alarm on phone to go through the material
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