Counseling - Prayers & Dying
Prayer around death and dying
What should we actually be praying for and how should we be living in such a season?
I have been thinking a lot about how we pray together for people in difficult circumstances. Tim Chester’s book in His Presence was very helpful. The puritan prayers for the sick and dying were not merely for healing, but for peace, sanctification etc through the trial.
I wrote very careful emails while my husband was dying with our prayer requests and we never asked for prayers for healing. I was very clear that the cancer was an answer to prayer. We had asked for his body to be taken before he no longer knew us, and that I could keep him home til the end. God answered so many of my prayers during that season, but there were few in my own church I could say this to, because they only prayed for healing. We joined in on zoom, but used to mute when they prayed for his healing and pray over it thanking God that the Holy Spirit translated our prayers. I wonder how many of our unanswered prayers are because we refuse to shift with the signs of providence and truly pray according to His will.
God and his providence were so gentle during that time, but going back to church afterwards was hard. I did not want to hear someone say that she was surprised God did not answer her prayers for healing. I obviously did not want my husband to die, but I, and he, experienced the goodness of God in that season, and I wanted to be able to thank Him before my congregation.
Now when I pray for others in prayer meeting I have been scolded because the person isn’t dying. It’s a long and slow walk through the valley of the shadow of death, and realistically we should not wait til the last minute to pray for their comfort.
My upcoming lesson on death and dying should be very interesting, because I do not want ostriches to put their heads in the sand.
It's so needed! There's a grief share group at my old church but I was hesitant to go because I don't trust it to be biblical. I'm sorry for the loss of your husband. My mom was sick for a long time and took so long to come to grips with the reality that she wouldn't get her healing. It was sad. She didn't accept it until her last few days, and she was quite confused and deflated.
God is not a magic gennie and it's so hurtful if people don't rightly understand God's sovereignty when people pray for healing like God has a magic password or something. It doesn't sit well if they don't get the answer they prayed for. Of course that foundational truth has to be laid before the trial because it would be awful to tell a grieving person that. Even if we are well versed in God's sovereignty, you don't go there.
We need to teach Providence far more. It’s so vast, and intricate. Everyone wants a miracle that violates the laws of nature, but the norm is that God works through the normal workings of nature. One of our former surgeon generals was a pediatric heart surgeon who believed God could perform miracles, but said he had never seen one.
We have to work with providence, and let the Lord lead, and we would see so many answered prayers.
Not everyone recovers and many die.
What are some ways God uses these kinds of situations?
*Grow us closer to God; to our knees and to the Word.
*Seeking comfort in God & knowing He is soverign
*Realigning our focus on Christ
*Reaching people around us for Christ (saved & unsaved); hospital workers, nurses & doctors we interact with, unsaved friends, coworkers, associates and family. Encouraging & causing the saved ones in our lives and church to do the listed here as well bcuz God is working in them through this too just as he would in times of persecution.
*In many cases it could be to give those we know some time around us to prepare for our loss; some might be devastated beyond repair if it was a sudden death.
* In some cases, due to the corruption that entered the world through the Fall & God knowing our lifespan, Babies might die before birth, stillborn or shortly after they're born. God is working through that situation as well.
Related Resources
Helps related to Grieving
Helps dealing with Cancer
Helps dealing with a loss of a Child
Footnotes
From an online conversation around dealing with death and dying.
Comments
Post a Comment